The Collected Wisdom of Cranky Old Geezers.

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  • The message on a Cranky Old Geezer's answering machine: "I'm not here right now. When I get back, I'm not going to return any calls. At the beep, just hang up."
  • Anything is worth doing has been done already.
  • When I was your age, I walked to school...Ten miles...In the snow...Uphill...Both ways.
  • Who the hell took the cent sign off keyboards. Look, I'm a Cranky Old Geezer. That means I'm gonna give you my two cents worth. And writing it as "my $.02" looks just plain silly. If I'm giving you my two cents, it means your getting "my 2¢". Put the damn ¢ back where it's supposed to be.
  • And while we're at it, pitch all that copier toner and crap. Let's go back to mimeograph machines. You not only got a copy, you got something that smelled good.











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